Monday, July 26, 2010

Sometimes, a girl just wants to look . . .

When you're out with your friends and you see two young men who are rather fine to look at, but young enough to be, well . . . your younger brothers, sometimes a girl just wants to look.

I can describe it best by using the following analogy.

So, you are walking down the street, and happen to pass the Porsche dealership. Inside you see a shiny new Cayenne.



It's beautiful to look at. You press your face up to the glass, and close your eyes and just for one moment, imagine running your tongue from it's sunroof to it's shiny bumper. Then you stop, and shake your head. Back to reality, back to 4th grade algebra, Btu's and building plans.

It's not like you will never have a Cayenne. It's just that you are not ready for the Cayenne right now. And when you are ready, maybe you don't want a Cayenne anymore. Maybe you would prefer an X5, or maybe something shinier and sleeker, or maybe you're into a hybrid by that time.

Buying a car is a HUGE commitment, it's an emotional commitment (shudder), how do you know when you're ready for it?

Friday, July 23, 2010

Cyanide and Happiness

I haven't been able to read C&H for a while due to restrictions of my internet access at work, so I was just reading through some of the posts now, and when I read this one, I truly did L O L.

Cyanide and Happiness, a daily webcomic
Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Edited to add : I know it doesn't fit properly - I spent like 1 minute trying to fix it and then gave up - click it. - Never mind!!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Just an FYI to spammers

To all the advertising spammers of the world. The chances of me responding to your cell phone ad spam is slim to none. The chances of me responding to your badly written, terribly juvenile ad spam is less than zero.

At least the e-mail advertising spam I get is mostly well written.

I'm just saying.

Friday, July 16, 2010

My lifes mission

I swear, even if it kills me, I will make sure at least one person in this world thinks logically. It is my mission in life to force others to think logically.

Day after day people come into my office and tell me something like "the plotter is not working" and then look at me with this look on their face. This look that says "I have thought long and hard about it, but despite my hours of contemplation, I cannot see any way forward from this dilemma. I have come to you, oh great knower of all, for you eternal wisdom and knowledge."

There was a time I would glance in my pocket, then under my desk, and proclaim loudly "the plotter repairing fairies are not hiding in my office at this time." But my magical wit was usually lost on them, and their brows would furrow and their heads would tilt about 15° to the left and a wave of confusion would wash over them like a soft and comfy blankie.

So I just gave up with the sarcasm, and now say "Well what did THE PLOTTER REPAIR PEOPLE say when you phoned them?"
Which is technically still sarcasm, but might actually get a point across.

It only takes about five minutes for them to get it.

I live in eternal hope that one day someone will walk into my office and say "The plotter is not working, the repair guy will be here tomorrow. Just letting you know"

Why? Why can people just not take the next logical step in situations such as this.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

You know what I don't get?

Seriously, you know what I don't get?

People who say they don't have time to eat.
Just to be clear, I am studying for a degree, trying to build a house, work full time and I'm a single parent. But do you know what I still make time for? Yup, eating. It's not like it's that a time consuming endeavor. I mean sure, I don't have time to cook, but that's what I have a mom for (love you mom) and I get that other people don't have a live-in-mom, but there are always alternatives (hello, Woolworths :-)).

People who don't use their indicators (flickers, turn signal, whatever).
It's the flick of a finger people - not rocket science. Just do it. Do it for my mental health. Do it to keep from eventually snapping and shoving a indicator where an indicator should never be shoved.

Twilight, et al.
I will admit having seen both Twilight and New Moon. I will also admit that they are not the WORST movies I have ever seen. I will even admit that they hold a certain appeal . . . . . to children. Ciara LOVES Twilight, and that's okay. Because she's nine. Anyone older than, say 11, who loves Twilight must be sat down for a good talking to.

Justin Bieber hate.
Look, I think the kid is an arrogant little baby, who sings terrible songs in the voice of a girl. I just don't care enough about him to summon any hate. As they say, this too shall pass.

Well, okay, so my second blog post for 2010 is done (go, me). Grief, I'm trying to be more attentive to you, my wilting blog, but it's just not that easy . . .